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Dumb Criminals

Man Calls 911, Asks Police to Buy Him Beer
Scott Olson, Getty Images
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Man Calls 911, Asks Police to Buy Him Beer

Talk about a bizarre beer run.

The AP is reporting that Raymond Roberge of Bridgeport, CT, dialed 911 three times on Sunday. When authorities finally showed up to his house, the 65-year-old man gave them money "to go to the store and buy him some bee

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After Fourth Marijuana Arrest, Man Gets Life in Prison
Uriel Sinai/Getty Images
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After Fourth Marijuana Arrest, Man Gets Life in Prison

Getting caught green-handed with marijuana is never a good thing, but when it's your fourth arrest on the same charge, it's a very, very bad thing.

Cornell Hood II learned that truth the hard way after a jury in Louisiana sentenced the repeat offender to life in prison.

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Man Vandalizes Garage With Spray-Painted Marriage Proposal [VIDEO]
wptv
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Man Vandalizes Garage With Spray-Painted Marriage Proposal [VIDEO]

We've seen our fair share of wacky marriage proposals, but this one might take the cake.

UPI reports that New York-based couple Roger and Carolyn Mooyoung got the surprise of their life when they received a letter informing them that their Florida vacation home had been vandalized.

According to the letter, someone had spray painted a marriage proposal on their garage, to which the recipient, named Alison, responded to with a spray-painted "yes."

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Man Shortchanged in Crack Deal Calls 911 for Help
tanjila, flickr
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Man Shortchanged in Crack Deal Calls 911 for Help

These days, everyone's counting their pennies. So when 41-year-old Dexter White got ripped off in a crack cocaine deal this week, he called police to fix the problem.

The South Carolina man told police he had given $60 to a drug dealer for crack, but only received $20 worth of drugs.

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Cops Find Robber Via Cash Trail
e53/flickr
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Cops Find Robber Via Cash Trail

The scene was straight out of a classic Saturday-morning cartoon: After a robber took an undisclosed amount of money from a local CVS, he made a mad dash to a nearby laundromat.

As he ran, the pile of cash in his arms left a trail behind him, making it an easy catch for police officers.

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Best Buy Employee Tackles Thief, Gets Fired
matteson.norman/flickr
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Best Buy Employee Tackles Thief, Gets Fired

Roger Kline may have saved the day when a thief tried to make good with over $1,600 in merchandise, but his instinct to tackle the sticky-fingered customer didn't save his job. In fact, it got him fired.

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Man Attempts to Run Marathon Nude
jordanfischer/flickr
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Man Attempts to Run Marathon Nude

It was likely meant to be a joke, but nude marathon runner Brett S. Henderson wasn't laughing Sunday when he got tased by police officers and slapped with public indecency and obstructing official business charges.

The 35-year-old Cincinnati resident was running -- sans clothes -- in Sunday's Flying Pig Marathon when police confronted him.

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Deaf Men Stabbed After Sign Language Mistaken for Gang Signs
Valerie Everett/flickr
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Deaf Men Stabbed After Sign Language Mistaken for Gang Signs

A group of hearing-impaired friends were reportedly stabbed in a bar after another bar patron mistook their sign language for gang signs. The group was at Ocean's Eleven Lounge in Florida celebrating a friend's birthday when the incident occurred.

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Homeless Man Robs Bank, Immediately Gives Money Away
My Fox Orlando
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Homeless Man Robs Bank, Immediately Gives Money Away

Elmer McGirt, a homeless man living in Tampa, FL, pulled a Robin Hood Thursday when he robbed an area Wachovia bank, then distributed some of his ill-gotten gains to the passengers on a city bus.

Yes, that means the 27-year old also made the unconventional choice to use public transportation as his getaway vehicle.

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Man Wearing Cow Costume Steals Milk From Walmart
Mario Tama, Getty Images
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Man Wearing Cow Costume Steals Milk From Walmart

A Virginia man was arrested after allegedly stealing 26 gallons of milk from a Walmart while wearing a cow suit and crawling on all fours.

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Man Walks Into Interstate Traffic to ‘Kick Dad’s Butt’
Kevork Djansezian, Getty Images
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Man Walks Into Interstate Traffic to ‘Kick Dad’s Butt’

Louisville resident Boris Simic was so angry at his dad for sexually neglecting his mom that he actually walked onto Kentucky's heavily trafficked I-264 in the pouring rain.

Simic's mission: to find his father (who lives 10 miles away) and kick his you-know-what.

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Habitual Paint Huffer Jailed (Again)
WANE.com
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Habitual Paint Huffer Jailed (Again)

The inhaling (or "huffing") of solvents can cause hearing loss, limb spasms, cardiac arrest, damage to the central nervous system and even frostbite to the nose.

On the bright side, the practice does make for some of the greatest mug shots ever.

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