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Dumb Criminals

Collier County Sheriff's Office
Collier County Sheriff's Office
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Man Blames Motorcycle Crash on Boogeyman

Hey, these are tough times, so even the boogeyman, long known for his work scaring little kids, has had to take a second job.

A Florida man who crashed his motorcycle and is accused of being drunk at the time told police the boogeyman was responsible for the crash.

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Keith Williamson, Flickr
Keith Williamson, Flickr
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Woman Steals Racks of Ribs and Oxtails in Her Purse

Some women carry gum or mints in their purse. Marie Chester carries dinner for a big family.

Police in Fort Pierce, Florida arrested the 40-year-old woman last week for shoplifting six full racks of ribs and two packs of oxtails from a supermarket. Somehow, she carried out the food in her pocketbook. The items she took were worth $57.60.

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Man Accused of Holding Up Convenience Store for 99 Cents
adam*b/flickr
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Man Accused of Holding Up Convenience Store for 99 Cents

A New York man now faces a whopping $50,000 bail after police said he tried to rob a convenience store of 99 cents.

Christopher Tisley, a 34-year-old Brooklyn resident, sauntered into the store at about 3 a.m. on Saturday with a gun and ordered the clerk to hand over the change, according to police.

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Woman Accused of Stealing Gas 8 Times From Same Station
Justin Sullivan, Getty Images
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Woman Accused of Stealing Gas 8 Times From Same Station

The high price of gas seems to have gotten to Karleena Kempf.

Police in Galesburg, Illinois arrested the 35-year-old woman Saturday on charges of stealing gas from the same service station on eight different occasions between May 19 and June 10.

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Wanted Man Gets Plastic Surgery To Become Woman In Effort To Avoid Arrest
Xurxo Lobato, Getty Images
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Wanted Man Gets Plastic Surgery To Become Woman In Effort To Avoid Arrest

Aaron Vera Morales is definitely more Vera than Aaron.

Prosecutors in Mexico City say Vera Morales underwent plastic surgery to appear as a woman so he could elude police who were trying to arrest him.

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Man Hides in Suitcase in Order to Steal From Luggage
o5com, Flickr
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Man Hides in Suitcase in Order to Steal From Luggage

Getting a conviction is in the bag.

That may be what prosecutors in Spain are thinking after a man was arrested for theft by worming his body into a suitcase that was loaded onto an airport bus just so he could squeeze back out and steal from other luggage.

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Man Beats Himself Up To Worm Out Of Drunken Driving Charge
Farmington Police Department
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Man Beats Himself Up To Worm Out Of Drunken Driving Charge

Drinking can cloud your thinking, which may explain why a Farmington, Connecticut man came up with a pretty boneheaded idea.

Authorities say Daniel Vagnini beat himself up to prove to police he had been assaulted to get out of being charged with drunken driving last Saturday.

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Mom Leaves Toddler Son In Car With Dead Body
Jefferson Parish Sheriff's Office
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Mom Leaves Toddler Son In Car With Dead Body

If Jessica Ockman had designs on becoming a stage mother, it seems she planned on her little bundle of joy's first role to be in a new 'Weekend at Bernie's' movie.

Authorities in Louisiana's Jefferson Parish have booked the 33-year-old woman on various charges after she left her 20-month-old son in a car for over an hour. The boy wasn't by himself in the car, mind you. Nope - he was in the company of a woman who just so happened to be dead.

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Man Charged With Murdering Fellow Partygoer Over Beer Pong Dispute
legozfreak, Flickr
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Man Charged With Murdering Fellow Partygoer Over Beer Pong Dispute

If you're going to kill someone, it should be for a good reason.

Like, you know, beer pong.

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Man Accused of Shooting at Grounded Plane
Maricopa County Sheriff's Office
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Man Accused of Shooting at Grounded Plane

Arizona resident Randon Reid gave police an early-morning scare Sunday when he reportedly shot at a grounded airplane at the Deer Valley Airport, then quickly fled the scene.

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Walmart Shoplifter Throws a Fit After Getting Caught in the Act
Spencer Platt, Getty Images
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Walmart Shoplifter Throws a Fit After Getting Caught in the Act

Stay classy, Walmart shoppers!

Police in Bradenton, Florida arrested a woman last Wednesday after she went loco when a store official stopped her while she tried to leave with a cart of goods she hadn't purchased.

When initially confronted, 22-year-old Myra Mays tried to hit an employee with a bar stool she had stuffed into her cart. She then knocked over a display of gas grills, which caused over $1,000 in damage.

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Bradley M. Furchak
Delaware State Police
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Woman Wakes Up to Drunk Burglar Sleeping on Her Couch

We've all read our fair share of ridiculous criminal stories on the Internet. But waking up to find a burglar sleeping on your couch? That takes it to a whole new level.

Just ask the 63-year-old Long Neck, DE, resident who sauntered into her living room Tuesday morning to find a drunk burglar passed out on her couch.

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